I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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