sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
