I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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