...so i touched it.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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