so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
