Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
