he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
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He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
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Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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