your thong is hanging out like whoa
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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