Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I just want to make out with him forever
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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