I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
