your room smells of hookers.
And success
he wants to bone in the snuggie
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
