do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
