Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
