Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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