Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize