Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
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The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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