come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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