The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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