He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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