Nicole vs. Life
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
