My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
