There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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