yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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