I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
