She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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