it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
