he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
