What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Randomize
