the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize