Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
