There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize