she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
