i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
