Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i think i have herpe
just one?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Randomize