i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
