I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
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