That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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