ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
im calling her cock vulture from now on
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
