my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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