sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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