He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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