I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
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