Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize