Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
