In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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