can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize