I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
