I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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