We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
We have started to decorate penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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