He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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